Thursday, December 17, 2015

contemplating change.

If you talk about change this time of year it's immediately assumed you are going into a post about New Years resolutions. But I'm not actually... I mean I suppose it could be... but  no. It's not.

Change for better or worse, just seems to find me this time of year. I started falling in love around Christmas one year, I quit smoking on a whim one year, and one year I lost my dad. This is just one of those times of year that the direction of my life hinges on.

I feel like Vianne in Chocolat, I can feel change blowing like the North wind.
And I want to heed it..

No matter how many times I tell my self I'm done, no matter how many resolutions I DO make for no more drama, no matter how much I look for ways to settle my ass down, I still feel the change when it's coming.

Even when it's not for the good. I feel it and I want to go with it.

Some people hate change, we all know that. Probably the majority do. But those like me... the gypsy-blood type. We are slaves to it.

So what's the big deal.. why does change illicit such strong emotions.. lets look at the pros and cons of this bad boy. kick the tires on it so to speak

Cons first.. I've always been into delayed gratification too..

  •      Uncertainty... it makes us feel unsure. In how to act, what to do, and what's expected
  •      Outcome... when no one knows what they are doing no one can efficiently create outcomes
  •      Efficiency... goes right out the window (at least for awhile)
  •      With all those things comes fear... fear especially of looking foolish.

But I'm a pro at looking foolish so nothing, at this point is going to ramp that up! I had a 4 month bookstore for Pete's sake.

Which brings us to the Pros of change

  •      Hope! that it'll work out better
  •      Fun... well I think change is fun, I believe thinking on and imagining possibilities is just about my favorite!!
  •      Mystery... who doesn't love surprises and the anticipation there of
  •      Excitement. Usually. Moves, job changes, travel, growth... exciting stuff!! 

Someone once said the only reason people ever seek change is because they have to. I don't believe that. I think sometimes we seek change for a challenge.

I was settled for years. I raised my kids and tried to take care of an aging mom. The kids are near on their own. Finishing college and Mom is being cared for. Which leaves me feeling....

like I hear that North wind starting to howl...


  1. Thanks for this post about change I am thinking about retirement. Soon. Very soon. Also I wanted to say about your comment about THE PEOPLE OF THE BOOK. Many of the gals in book club had trouble with The People of the Book because it jumps around to different time periods. My family and I listened to the audiobook of it and LOVED it, none of us had trouble with the time jumps at all. I really recommend that format for the book. Merry Christmas!

    1. rats! I already have the book version. But I've rarely had a hard time with time jumps.

  2. Change is hard, yes, but sometimes it is what is needed, to get us out of ruts. Good luck in whatever changes you make in the upcoming year.

    1. who knows! It'll be a 'go with it' sort of happening. sometimes they are big... like moving (which I just did so wont again) sometimes not so big, like get my hair cut short stopping dying it.